The holy grail in ones life may be to achieve in reality those scenes that one plays out so perfectly in ones mind. Have you accomplished that... at least once? What was it like? Was every detail as intense and intimately the same as it was in your vision? How long did the euphoria last? Did the scene live on to become something permanent in your life or was it transient and shifting on the breezes of loose emotions to transform into something vague and indifferent with time?
Before I ever physically ventured to the mountains I had my very own picture-perfect vision. A scene of what my ideal life would be like if I indeed gathered the courage and took the cue to 'get the hell out' and move from my perceived state of misery and quasi-pathetic existence to where I truly understood I needed to be. I have been to mountainous areas in four different countries and on three different continents searching for that very same vision. You know, it's the vision that is so vivid in your mind that you just know you will recognize it instantly when you see it, feel it, hear it... become immersed in its intensity of purpose! You will just know.
When I close my eyes and let myself into my inner thoughts I perceive the sense that I have almost been there. I intrinsically know that several times I have been so very close to wandering into that special scene, that special place with its unique site and situation that entices each of my senses just so. In all of the most sincere honesty though, I must share, that I have never truly arrived! Not once have I been able to stop, to freeze and fiercely proclaim that "this is it - my perfect vision at last!". I am left with a primal sense of deep longing for what I almost found! This feeling of longing is mixed with an intense euphoria derived from the realization of being so very close to something that I crave so much. What I found and experienced was a piece of my vision, a segment that when combined with others begins to complete the picture much like an incredibly complex puzzle in ones mind. This drives me to keep looking, to keep believing that my vision can indeed be a blissful reality. So I continue searching for my very own aspect of tranquility, knowing deep inside that I will find it... I know I have been there before, just not quite able to put my finger on it!
So, some of us develop the courage, the ambition and the immunity to the adverse advice of the Grey They and embark on a journey of discovery. A journey to capture the rapture of that pristine vision and to live within its intricate details! I have truly met a few souls on my own journey who could solidly state that they have arrived, that they are indeed immersed in THE life within their very own special vision! Yes, they were innately happy, full of joy, peace and had a powerful sense of vibrant energy about them. Their scene, it's site, situation and accompanying stimulants may not have been for my senses, but it was theirs, the actualization of their very own special vision. These unique individuals gave me hope and the strength I needed to continue my on my own journey for the reality of my own unique vision. Knowing that I was not alone on such a quest was monumental. The realization that there were awesome others who had believed against all odds and left much behind to discover their own unique vision of existence renewed my confidence and fortified my resistance to the incessant negative barrage from the Grey They! I am sure that you other visionaries out there experience this debilitating 'friendly fire' from Grey friends and family too! The guilt trips and pointing of crooked fingers in your direction... mmmmm, you've been there too!
I continue on my journey-quest. I do enjoy meeting and sharing with like-minded souls. You are relatively few and far between, but take to heart what it is that I am sharing. On each leg of my journey I meet more of you and cherish all of you. Most recently, thank you to a special person on their own journey who took the time to be a true friend and to allow me to live in a very special place in Otter Point, BC. This special place turned out to be yet another elusive fragment of my vision, one that makes complete a critical series of pieces to the puzzle. I am close, so very close now. You know I will persevere, I will continue my journey until it is abundantly clear to me that I have arrived... am indeed immersed within my vision, senses tingling and an intense life energy vibrating in tune with every cell of my being!
For those of you who identify, who understand my ramblings... please say hi... stay tuned, follow my blog... and make sure you keep in touch! Much love and ciao for now!
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